Halloween Candy and How I Can Get Some

My favorite time at Halloween is about 20 minutes after my kids go to bed on Halloween Night. This is when I admittedly raid my kids' Trick-or-Treat bags to pull out my favorites to indulge in - Snickers Bars, Kit Kats, Peanut Butter Cups, and Sour Apple Blow Pops. And my kids know I do this.

I recently read a blog that suggested that you could teach your kids a lesson in tithing by requiring that they give you 10% of their spoils. I won't even go into all the theological problems I have with this. I don't think I need to make a spiritual lesson out of what they've gathered in order to get some of their candy. My kids are pretty good about sharing their candy with me to begin with.

Why?

I think it's so easy for my kids to want to ultimately share their candy with me because of how much I participate in the whole experience with them. From planning their costume, to taking them out trick-or-treating, to spreading out their candy with them at the end of the night to sort out their loot, to our debriefing of how the night went (who gave out the best candy, which was the scariest house, what fun costumes we saw)...we were in it together.

What a perfect parenting lesson. When we're "in it together", there is more cooperation, more sharing, more give and take, more FUN. When I tell them what to do "because I said so", when I have expectations for them that I don't expect for myself, when there is an atmosphere of "us" versus "the kids", there is resistance and frustration (on both sides).

The truth is, good parenting gets you "Snickers Bars", so-to-speak. When we take away our need to control, rule, and dominate our children and instead coach, teach, and participate in life with them, parenting our children is so much easier and sweeter.

And you don't have to fight to get your favorite candy out of the trick-or-treat bag.

By the way, what's YOUR favorite Halloween candy?